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The First Sighting

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Blood Red Sun




One day a long time ago me ad my good friend Geoffrey were camping in a place that was eventually called Southern Kilaran Field we were going to be there for five night camping under the stars. On the first night everything was fine we got there by 3o’clock, set up the tents and ate. We went to bed about 9 and woke up about 8:30.…I got up and got dressed then went outside to find a blood red sun rising on the horizon I turned to see Geoffrey getting out of his ten when I saw his tent in ruins! It was all ripped and mangled….There were large foot prints leading away from the tent so I followed, when I heard growling I froze I peered thru the twilight and saw them 12foot tall with 1 eye, it probably weighed a ton and bits of body lying at his feet…. I recognised them as Geoffrey…. torn apart limb from limb in the middle of the night…. Then I remembered the scream, the scream I had heard in his dream that must have been Geoffrey screaming for help.

That night I searched the remains of Geoffrey’s tent and found a little Geoffrey had kept secret a sword was tucked neatly under his pillow I decided to go kill that 1 eyed freak I thought: “maybe it’s got a weakness…. Of course better try the eye, that would surely bring the beast down.â€

The next morning I snuck up on the place where I saw it the day before. Bits of Geoffrey were still there that gave me a boost of confidence and reminded me of what I was going to do. The creature was still there and I noticed as I got closer that it had leather torso on and “is that a pair of shorts?????†I thought. It also carried a club in one hand, this particular club was made of oak and it was studded with metal balls…. I got to the edge of the clearing and found another creature there it was tall, fat and bald it also smelled really bad….

I got right behind the creature before it spotted me or heard me, it picked me up and I had a clear shot of the eye I jabbed the sword forward (I had added metal hooks to the sword the previous night) and it burst through the eye like a pin into a bubble my attached hooks caught the inside of the eye and I wiggled the sword about to get it free but it wouldn’t come out, I gave it a huge wrench and it came free the monstrosity let go of my and toppled over backwards, twitched and died… good the creature was gone from my life forever……..

“WAAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH†was the only thing I heard before I was swiped off my feet, the pot bellied creature was holding me now and I couldn’t think of a weakness, then I thought: “maybe I could use its belly to my advantageâ€. I swung the sword and it caught on the arm of the monster it howled in rage and dropped me.

“OGRE KILL YOU BECAUSE YOU KILL OGRE’S FRIEND!!†the monster yelled. While it was screaming in pain and shouting at me I crawled under its belly so it couldn’t see me I thrust the sword up through it’s stomach and blood poured onto me, it howled and toppled and ogre lay next to the no eyed monster. They looked so peaceful I stabbed them both once to make sure they were dead. I went back to the camp got my stuff and headed home to the city of White Stone.









Extract from the diary of Master Mage Malcolm Edwards










P.S wat do u think of that? :twisted:

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It's not bad. Spruce it up a bit (as in, type it out properly, with all the grammar and punctuation mistakes corrected), and we'll try to fit it into the stories section.


Two things, though:

1) If this is from the diary of a Master Mage, how come there's no magic?

2) Since this is a diary entry, I suggest you think about different ways of presenting it. Read Geelef's "Diary of a Common Man" to get some ideas about format and style.



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