RipTide Report post Posted May 23, 2022 (edited) Eternal Land News reporter Ace Jackson back from a long vacation reporting. First a word from our sponsor: I needs a new sponsor!!! What started out as a simple bet has spread into pure mayhem. All across these eternal lands bar fights have been breaking out. I have it on good authority that the west side Brownie gang bet the east side Brownie gang that they couldn’t steal a bottle of hooch from the IP tavern. Reca caught the little miscreants in the very act. Knocking the bottle from the brownie’s hand, she threw it at them. The bottle smashed against the wall. The east side looking for an excuse to take out pent up aggression, attacked the west side. On the mainland at the Lakeside tavern, Garg the gargoyle was relaxing after a long hard night of killing unsuspecting n00bs at the WS sto. When suddenly an UG hobgoblin burst in yelling bar fight. Garg threw his mug at the hobgoblin and the fight was on. In TG the cave orc pair had been hoping for a little orclet and it finally happened. They were holding a baby shower at the tavern with all their friends when a group of gargoyles from the other cave decided to crash the party. A giant in Theli caught the news from a passing hawk. He promptly went to the bar. The band New Feros under the block was playing. Wanting to dance the giant ripped the roof off to get inside. Folks, the events I relay to you next were too terrible to behold. Once inside the bar the giant began twerking. I kid you not, he was twerking. Feros were thrown against the walls and into each other. A group of Leg orcs on an outing from NRM. were thrown down. They shoved back at the feros causing the fight to begin. Word quickly spread through the Monsters Lives Matter Network that the bars were not treating their brethren fairly. Protests were sent to the various taverns. From tavern to tavern, map to map, fights erupted. A great call was issued forth for the civilian defense force. Stay tuned for an update… Edited May 24, 2022 by Acelon Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RipTide Report post Posted July 7, 2022 (edited) Labor day woes Ace Jackson reporting That dastardly mod Riptide is at it again, but first a word from or sponsor. No-Burpium Does a long day of mixing with feasting pots give you acid re-flux? Does the sight of a Acelon spawned dragon horde cause the acid in your stomach burn a hole straight through your gut? Portia’s No-Burpium potions come to the rescue. No-Burpium will neutralize the acid in your stomach and get you back into the fight! Visit Portia in Portland today. (Disclaimer: No-Burpium is not intended to actually cure anything. The makers of No-Burpium cannot be held responsible for any adverse reactions. You drank the potion it’s your fault for drinking it…...) The dreaded Labor day began quietly enough, when out rang a cry of #REMOVEEEEEEDAY!@!!@!@#@!!! Quickly followed a cold callus reply of “buy a stone and remove it,” by that detestable mod Riptide. The adversity sensitive Invisiblesun got his butt hurt by vile ol’ Riptide. I mean, how could Invisiblesun be expected to pay for a bad day remove stone? We can all understand how deserving he is. Riptide went off to do his job for Haidir in the pk map Tahraji desert. Bold Riptide announced to all that he was in TD waiting. Kenshin trying to score brownie points or something offered to PK the contemptable Riptide. Riptide completed his job and strolled out of the map. I tried to interview him later and the incredulous mod denied any wrong doing as usual. Ace Jackson, out! Edited July 7, 2022 by RipTide Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
