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Kayliana

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Hey, Kayliana, I first heard this story through Prattler, and I was wondering if you'd consider making a couple of minor changes?

 

1) Correct the spelling of Aluwen's name. :P

2) Can you change the years that the Dragons were trapped for from 400 to a longer period of time - say 2,000 or 4,000? It strikes me as highly unlikely that they would be forgotten and the Palace reduced to ruins in such a short period of time. (That would only be, what...one generation of Elves? And the Draegoni would certainly remember...)

 

-Lyn-

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Hm I see a lot of good things in this story. I want to work in the dragon part for sure into the official EL history.

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One last thing to change, Kay. Make the time that the Dragons were trapped an unspecified time, instead of the two thousand years I previously suggested. Say something like, "for millennia", or "throughout the years", or something of the sort. Probably better that way, since it doesn't fix us to a definite time frame, and synchronises better with the Age Timeline. We won't have to constantly re-edit it too, if there are any discrepancies in timing later.

 

-Lyn-

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I've been able to pick up a few small errors that maybe should be fixed before it is the finished history:

 

Aluwen cherished all life[] as she -- "life, as she"

roam [Eternal-Lands], the -- Eternal Lands

with [Eternal] life, though -- eternal (unless it has a special meaning)

body, knowledge, [magick], and a -- magic

their [long-life], and -- longetivity

of the [Eternal-Lands] there was war. Many -- Eternal Lands

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Editing style:

context context [error] context -- First edit

In my siggy now. Dunno if that backwards-updates like post count.

Edited by freeone3000

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their [long-life], and -- longetivity

It's longevity... not longetivity.

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All right then. I'm sorry you couldn't come back and work with us, Kay... :P:D

 

Will remove both stories from the history, as requested.

 

-Lyn-

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