KillerQween Report post Posted April 16, 2005 Really Dumb Things To Think About......and you WILL think...... § Can you cry under water? § How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? § If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? § Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? § Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? § Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? § Why does a round pizza come in a square box? § What disease did cured ham actually have? § How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? § Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? § If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? § If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you? § Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? § Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? § How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America? § Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway. § If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call? § Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural? § Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup? § Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out!" and was it trial and error with other animals.......and their body parts? § Why do toasters always even have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? § Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? § If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him? § Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? § If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? § Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? § Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! § What do you call male ballerinas? § Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream? § If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner? § If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from? § Think Disney World is a huge trap operated by a MOUSE? It sort of IS! § Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? § Why did you just try singing the two songs above? § Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Leeloo Report post Posted April 16, 2005 § Can you cry under water? Yes, but you won't be able to see it. § Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? Because you buy the wrong kind? I always use square meat. § Why does a round pizza come in a square box? Because a round box is way too hard to make. § If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you? Very likely. § If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call? There are more than one 911 operator working. Someone needs to be able to answer the phone when he/shee goes to the bathroom. § Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Because your freezer was too cheap to put in a light. My parents freezer does have a light. § If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? It would ruin the show. § Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! Goofy was meant to be a rat, not a dog. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ember Report post Posted April 16, 2005 Goofy was meant to be a rat, not a dog. 153580[/snapback] Say what?!?!? says who?!?!? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mad_Raven Report post Posted April 16, 2005 Say what?!?!? says who?!?!? 153618[/snapback] Isn't he a donkey? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tanyia Report post Posted April 16, 2005 § How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America? 153555[/snapback] Do you REALLY want to see 50 old guys in Speedos on stage? I didn't think so! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shasso Report post Posted April 16, 2005 wow Leeloo, you are so smart Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RolandR1 Report post Posted April 16, 2005 Do you REALLY want to see 50 old guys in Speedos on stage? I didn't think so! 153652[/snapback] theres more than 2 presidents to vote for it just comes down to the final 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
007 Report post Posted April 16, 2005 § Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? 153555[/snapback] The extra penny goes toward funding for the set of the next lunar landing somewhere in montana. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
goatsgomoo Report post Posted April 16, 2005 § Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? Maybe one phrase was made after another, so it was adjusted for inflation? § Why did QJ use §s as bullets? I mean... why not ± or ‰? Why not ¤ or •? What about all those °'s, µ's, and ¶'s? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LaNora Report post Posted April 16, 2005 § Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? *******i hope to god not! § Why does a round pizza come in a square box? *******government experiment § How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America? *******to answer to tanyia....MAYBE! § Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? *******technically, yes § If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? *******idiot savant § What do you call male ballerinas? *******premier danseur Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ghrae Report post Posted April 17, 2005 theres more than 2 presidents to vote for it just comes down to the final 2 153685[/snapback] Actually, in most recent elections there are more than 2 on the ballats. Typically we hear about "only 2" because they are backed by the largest parties and thus get the most endorsements and advertising. I hate to say this, but I think the average person prefers a one-on-one battle as well. Look at all sports! When's the last time you saw three teams enter the field? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grum Report post Posted April 17, 2005 Actually, in most recent elections there are more than 2 on the ballats. Typically we hear about "only 2" because they are backed by the largest parties and thus get the most endorsements and advertising. I hate to say this, but I think the average person prefers a one-on-one battle as well. Look at all sports! When's the last time you saw three teams enter the field? 153852[/snapback] Last time I watched athletics. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
goatsgomoo Report post Posted April 17, 2005 Look at all sports! When's the last time you saw three teams enter the field? 153852[/snapback] *Imagines 5 people all stabbing each other with swords, all hooked up to a single machine, and on a single 4-ft wide strip.* Yeh, it's sometimes only 2 for other reasons.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
